Love can be amazing, beautiful, colourful, inspirational… It can also be painful, regrettable, soul destroying, emotional.
But in life, you have to take risks even if you know that in the end, and theres always an end, that it can bring you a lot of pain.
I’m sure like me, you’ve had relationships which felt like whirlwinds. You didn’t know if you were coming or going. A mix between Katy Perry’s ‘Hot n Cold’ and Taylor Swift’s ‘Out of the Woods’ – Even those two hate each other. How ironic.
And the relationship eventually ends with feelings of frustration, anger, hatred, jealousy and spite but at least you feel something.
Have you even been in a relationship where it has just fizzled out? Where your best friend is just someone you pass on the street? I think sometimes, this can be even more of a test.
What are you supposed to do when you feel nothing. Spending a year and a half in a relationship with someone and it’s been an amazing relationship to suddenly growing apart and having nothing in common. IT IS THE WEIRDEST FEELING!
And then the range of emotions come…
Anger … but with yourself. How did this happen?
Frustration … but he is such a good person and nothing bad happened so why did this happen?
Failure… way to go, you couldn’t even keep a good one!
Disappointment… I thought I’d done the bad boy thing, found a good guy and this was it…
and the vicious cycle of emotions keep on spinning.
YOU PUT YOUR BIG GIRL PANTS ON, LISTEN TO BEYONCE AND REALISE YOU ARE SINGLE BECAUSE YOU CHOSE TO BE.
Sometimes people cannot come up to your level and sometimes, no matter how amazing they are, you cannot settle for less. My ambition, drive and independence can sometimes be a curse but it is time to see it as something to be proud of.
In the last 7 years, I have had 4 long term boyfriends. Some treated me like a princess and some treated me like a trophy and some treated me like a doormat. I was loved and I was lost. But each time, I have walked away. You know that feeling in your stomach that you get when things aren’t right? TRUST IT.
Trust your instinct and NEVER settle for less.
So here I am, Single again and by choice. I have cried and I have smiled and now, I am accepting that this is my summer of single and I am on to bigger and better things.