Last night, I had a phone call from my ex boyfriend.
We went through a hell of a lot together in a year. We partied a lot. We partied for the wrong reasons.
The break up was hard because I really loved him but he was holding me back and he wasn’t there for me when I needed him.
5 months later… I am mentally and physically happier and stronger. Okay, so I still have problems to solve but who hasn’t? Thats life.
So, the conversation came around because I have recently started talking to an old friend of his because I was concerned about him as I know he has his own problems to solve. BUT apparently, this means I want to sleep with him. Because thats who I am. It’s nice to know that someone I spent a year of my life with doesn’t know me at all. I was always a party girl but sleeping around was never my style. I would rather find happiness from myself than searching for it from other people who will constantly let me down.
I received a text from him saying that if I met up with this guy, he would have to hurt him. Even though its been 5 months, I feel like I’ve grown up so much and this seemed very silly and immature to me. So, I called my ex. I asked him what he was going on about and that he was being silly and if he knew me at all, he wouldn’t of even said that. He continued to make me feel bad for talking to someone he knows (we live in Gosport, its inevitable) so I just reminded him that he is now friends with girls who hurt me, his ex girlfriends and also the girl who broke us up BUT it’s not my place to moan at him for it because WE ARE NOT TOGETHER and in the words of Taylor Swift, “WE ARE NEVER EVER GETTING BACK TOGETHER”.
Yawn. I’m actually bored writing this.
Anyway, he called me back after hanging up on me and apologised. I think my mind has blocked out most of the conversation already but from what I can remember, he was sorry and he should of been there for me and he’s working on his car (which I told him that if I was his girlfriend and I heard about his car again, I’d kill myself). He then went on about his insecurities and I just point blank told him that nothing was ever going to change or get better for him unless he does something about it.
And this is why I have come to the conclusion: MY EX BOYFRIEND IS A TREE.
Whenever I have become unhappy, depressed or uncomfortable in life, I have got off my arse and done something about it. Sometimes, it’s taken me a year to do so, sometimes it has taken me a couple days but I HAVE DONE IT.
However, my ex will continue to say “It’ll all work out” or “It will be okay in the end”. This is all fine and dandy but the difference between him and I is that he will never get up and do anything to make sure that it will be okay in the end,
AND THIS IS WHY I AM A POTTED PLANT.
We both have roots, we will always have a home. We will both lose our flowers and leaves and other times, we will blossom but the difference between us is that a tree is rooted to the ground. A potted plant you can move. You can put it on the fire place and watch it grow or you can put it in the garden and watch it blossom into something beautiful.
What I’m trying to say is that we all have choices and if you are not happy, then move because you are not a tree! Nothing good comes to those who wait. if you want to achieve and succeed then you need to get up, go out and do something about it because life is too short and I definitely do not want to remain rooted to where I am right now.
I am going to blossom.